Disconnected From Church

Posted on by theycallmetater

I am currently in the process of shopping for a new church. Church has been an important part of my life since I was a kid. I know that there are people out there who will read this and who don’t care about/like church. I get that. But, it matters to me.

Even before the recent events at church, I was feeling disconnected and like I didn’t really fit in at my current church. Three pastor changes since I’ve been there probably didn’t help.

I was also not involved in the church at all.

I chaperoned a few youth things.

I joined a worship committee that met twice and then was never heard from again.

I still deliver backpacks of food to schools for the Backpack Buddies program,

Otherwise, I did not feel like I was part of the church family. I attended the church for over 10 years and still felt like an outsider.

Then, I attended a funeral at the first church I attended when I moved to Maryland. Several others who attended that church and who were parents of the kid I worked with in the youth group were also there. It reminded me of everything I was missing at my current church.

Then, the survey and the meeting and the “while we can’t disaffiliate from the UMC, we are doing so in spirit” news made me finally start to look for a new church.

I’ve attended three so far. One was definitely not the right place. The other two are maybes. I still have a few others to visit.

It’s hard because I am going alone and have no input from others who might attend with me once I decide on a church.

It’s hard because I would prefer non-denominational churches to avoid denominational politics, but some of them seem to be Southern Baptist churches in disguise.

I already feel mostly disconnected and alone in the world. This church stuff has amplified it.

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16 thoughts on “Disconnected From Church”

  1. I’m sorry you are experiencing this. Church or religion should make us feel better and feel like we are in a community that supports us. I hope you find a group that adds meaning and value

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  5. All the very best with your search Tater. Finding a community that you can genuinely feel a part of has such a huge part to play in improving mental health.

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  6. It’s probably farther away than you’re looking for since it’s in the city and perhaps not necessarily the style of church you’re looking for, but I love my church. It’s non-denominational. We have co-pastors one black and one white and there is a large focus on reconciliation. They have very different preaching styles which is kind of cool. We are currently meeting at the Baltimore Museum of Industry, so pretty easy to get to from 95 if you do want to trek north into the city. We don’t have our own building, so there has been a bit of rolling with the punches in terms of location since COVID since we had to leave Digital Harbor High School where we used to meet. But it’s kind of a fun location to meet with lots of free parking. We meet outside in their pavilion during the warm months and are currently inside the museum for a few more weeks. Can’t beat the view either way. Anyway, if you’re interested in checking it out at all it’s Grace City Baltimore. https://gracecitybaltimore.org/

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  8. Wow!

    I’m impressed by your post. I think you voice a problem a lot of people have yet don’t know what it is. Not that you do either. But being “disconnected” AT CHURCH is probably the right word for it, and if that is happening, it really says something.

    Hey, I’m in Texas, so I can’t take you with me where I am a member, BUT I’ve recently been studying a book about Rethinking Church, and as part of that, I’ve been blogging on it. As part of THAT too, I have started a hypothetical church online. It’s called Last Church of Lubbock, Texas. You are welcome to come check it out. You can come anonymous, and I won’t even know it’s you. Or you can speak up, and I certainly will welcome you, and will value your input too.

    Here’s a link:

    https://fatbeggars.wordpress.com/2023/04/23/last-church-of-lubbock-texas/

    https://fatbeggars.wordpress.com/2023/04/30/shooting-sprout-a-sermon-for-last-church/

    https://fatbeggars.wordpress.com/2023/05/07/last-church-dealing-with-filters/

    If you come to visit on Sunday, and if you speak up and let us know you are here, you might should oughta be prepared “bring the message.” It could happen.

    God bless you…

    Agent X
    Fat Beggars School of Prophets
    Lubbock, Texas (USA)

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