A General Sense of Unease

I know I’ve mentioned here before that sometimes I have days where I wake up with a lingering sense of unease or impending doom. When that happens, it is very hard to do much that takes any level of brain power. Today is one of those days. I woke up with a lingering anxiety. It’s hard for me to focus on doing anything more than mindless tasks today. It was a chore just to write those sentences. I can’t quite place what is fueling the anxiety, I can think of a couple of possible culprits.

My wife is driving to her mom’s house in Kentucky today. On the day when all the news is about issues with gas shortages in places. She is bad about waiting until the last minute to get gas. I might be anxious about her running out of gas on the trip.

It might be the things that are bringing back memories of the bad times from lockdown last year. My daughter is home(by choice this time to see her best friend who is home), Hogan is speaking about Covid stuff this afternoon, and I still don’t leave the house much. It seems like 2020 again.

It could be some anxiety about the return to normal and the possibility of a different level of risk tolerance from each member of the family. How do you navigate that?

It could be my mom’s birthday and Mother’s day over the weekend dredging up the grief of losing her.

It could be a dream I don’t remember from last night.

It could be nothing but my brain deciding it’s time to be worried and stressed with no trigger.

I think this will be a day of watching movies on the couch.


22 thoughts on “A General Sense of Unease

  1. Sometimes there is no reason. We just have to sit and be kind to ourselves. In psychoanalysing our emotions we can often make something out of nothing. Sounds like a good day to take it easy on the couch!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Take the day and take care of yourself. Free floating anxiety is brutal…it is so much easier when you can put a finger on “what” it is that is causing the feeling.

    Also, I agree with LA, “productive” can be evil.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I would count taking care of yourself as one of the most important activities on the planet. Sometimes it is “active”, sometimes it is “passive”, but neither category diminishes the value of doing what you can to be ok.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. I suffer from the same anxiety. Some days I wake up with it and try to pinpoint what’s causing it, but can’t always find the cause. What helps me is having a notebook and pen in my nightstand. When I wake up, I write three pages longhand. All the rambling thoughts in my brain and to do lists. It helps to have a brain dump and then be able to start the day fresh.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. It doesn’t get rid of anxiety all together, but it definitely helps. I got the idea from a book called “The Artists Way” by Julia Cameron. It goes through a 12-week program to foster creativity and that’s one of her basic tools.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Somedays you just have to fight through the feelings. Sometimes I try something totally alien to me like listening to my husband’s music which is a different style and then I listen to mine and somehow opposite makes me relax. If it makes sense. I can’t read self-help books, but reading a good crime story and knowing I am safe, at least for today helps.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I think your sense of unease is totally rational. Everything you listed is a stressor, and the cumulative effect is likely to be what’s causing your unease. Give yourself a break and try to relax more. Unfortunately you have little to no control over these stressors, which makes everything worse.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’ve lived with depression for decades, but added anxiety to the mix at the start of last year – and my is it a little demon. One primary “stay well” practice is to read fiction, but anxiety rendered me completely incapable. Like you, the couch and feel good viewing is all that worked. This past weeks, I’ve felt depression descend. It was most unwelcome as it struck on my birthday and hung around for the days following. But stuff will wear a person down, despite knowing that I’m loved, and despite being utterly spoiled. The only option for recovery was to withdraw for a while, so I only needed to expend energy making sure the really important people in my life had no cause to worry. Take good care & I hope your waking today was a better one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I went through a bad stretch last summer where I couldn’t focus on reading. It was terrible. I’ve struggled some lately, but it’s not as bad as then. A little better this morning, but still dealing with some general anxiety.

      Liked by 2 people

  7. I can’t let my anxiety get the best of me, hence why I am at the beach for 3 days. Yeah it ain’t 100% normal yet but it definitely helps to get away from the day to day. I’m grateful that unlike my friends in Canada that I can actually get out, that lockdown hasn’t still been going on. Hope you break through the fog Alan, it sucks being lost in it for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Two quotes that I like concerning fear are:

    Psalm 34:4
    “I sought the Lord, and he answered me
        and delivered me from all my fears”.

    Philippians 4:13
    ” I can do all things through him who strengthens me”.

    While we can try to do things on our own, God is able to help us in dealing with our fears. God is able to put things in order for us and to make things work out for our good. To overcome fear, we need to put God first. God is the king and there is nothing impossible for him to do.

    If anyone reading is interested in building a relationship with God, I have a post on that here: https://christcenteredruminations.wordpress.com/2018/08/29/how-to-build-a-relationship-with-god/

    There is much more to know about God. I post frequently on my blog about topics related to God. You are welcome to follow my blog to keep up with my content.

    -All the best. May God bless you. 

    Liked by 1 person

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