I’m deep into corn teen(quarantine) at the moment. It’s been over a week since I’ve left my neighborhood. I only leave the house to walk the dog. I don’t see that changing any time soon. I thought I was going to get out for a brief period Sunday to retrieve the rest of the stuff from my daughter’s dorm but that has been delayed. My last day at work was Friday the 13th. Since then, the only time I’ve left my neighborhood was when I was assigned to go to the library to empty the book drop. Since we are no longer doing that I no longer have a reason to leave the house. You would think someone who says they want to be a hermit would be OK with this. For the most part, I am OK with it. I’m OK with not leaving the house. I’m not OK with other things and that is what leads to my anxiety and depression.
I’m sad that my daughter can only talk to her friends via video although she seems OK with it for now.
I worry about my son who does not live with us.
I’m sad about the number continuing to rise and the deaths that are mounting.
I’m anxious about my work that has gone from in-person public service to telework and figuring out what that is.
I worry about my niece who is a trauma nurse at Vanderbilt.
I’m anxious about how long this will last and how long we will have to stay isolated.
I’m frustrated with the political fighting that is still happening as people die.
I’m trying to not consume too much news.
I’m trying to avoid social media and/or hide all of the people there who are stressing me out.
I’ve texted with my siblings. but I think maybe I should try to do Zoom or something with them to feel more connected.
I’m trying to balance productivity and mental health. It isn’t easy.
Not writing has made it worse. I need to get back to writing something that isn’t a long list of how I’m feeling. It is therapeutic.
So, that is where my mind is at right now. At least I am healthy at the moment.