Usually apps like Timehop and the Facebook “On this Day” are fun. Today, it was not. It has been one year since my mom lost her battle with cancer. I wasn’t sure I would write anything today. I thought about doing a funny post to avoid the sad, but it seems like it would be better for me to write about it.
It has been a tough year. In addition to losing my mom, I changed jobs, we are in the process of college applications for our youngest kid and my brother had a heart attack. That’s a lot in one year. I admit now that changing jobs one month after losing my mom was a very bad idea. When grieving, normal can be a very good thing. I’ve not really had normal this year(most would say I have never been normal). I’ve dealt with a lot of stress, depression and general melancholy. Some mornings it takes all I have to get up and get out of the house. Some mornings I just feel sad and on the verge of tears. Some mornings I’m OK. Once I’m out of the house I’m generally good. I go to work and do a decent job. I write dumb little blog posts. It’s getting better, but I’m still not completely myself. I didn’t see or talk to my mom as much as I should have, but I miss her a lot.