The World's Common Tater

I use Facebook a lot. I know it’s no longer cool to use Facebook, but no one has ever accused me of being cool. I’ve noticed several types of Facebook users. I’ve decided to list them here. If you think I am talking about you, I probably am.

 

1. The Serial Liker – This person likes everything you post. It doesn’t matter what the post says or what’s in the picture. They will like it. They might not even read it before they like it. I’m not sure why. Maybe they want you to feel good about the fact that someone liked your post. Maybe they want to make sure you know at least one person is reading your feed. Personally, I want to want to earn the like. If my post is boring or stupid, don’t like it. It will make me a better Facebooker.

 

2. The Sharer Only – This persons feed is full of shared stuff. Pictures, political statements, comics, etc but no original thought or posts. This includes the “share this if you love X” posts. II would prefer to hear what you think, what is going on in your life, see your pictures not just a collection of things you saw in the internet that day. Most of them aren’t that funny or interesting.

 

3. The Picture Tagger – This person tags pictures with people who aren’t in the picture as a way to share the picture with those people. I prefer my pictures to be tagged with only the people in the actual picture. I don’t like to be tagged in random pictures that don’t include me. My legions of fans are disappointed when they click and don’t get to see a picture of me. If you want me to see the picture and think I might have missed it, send me a message.

 

4. The Wanna Be Comedian – This one is probably me. Posting things that I think are funny, but probably aren’t. Most likely because of self esteem issues and the use of humor to try to hide a multitude of personal insecurities. Or maybe I am really funny. I don’t know.

 

5. The Politician – Every post is about their political opinion or a shared article that pushes their political agenda. At the same time, they will get angry if someone posts a political opinion that goes against theirs. They don’t want to hear anything from the other side, They only want to read things that tell them they are right. There is no room for reasonable discussion here.

 

6. The Evangelist – This is the person who only posts things to convert others to their religion. I also include the atheist evangelist in this category. They want everyone to believe or disbelieve exactly as they do. Many on both sides do so with the best of intentions and with love, but others do so more to condemn those who don’t agree than to actually reach other people.

 

7. The Marketer – They are only on Facebook to sell you something. They don’t care about your posts, your pictures, your life. They only want your eyes on their ads. Every post is about what they are selling and the entire reason they joined Facebook is to expand their marketing base.

 

8. The Over Sharer – You will always know where this person is because they check in everywhere they go. They tell you what they are having for dinner(sometimes with photos), what they are watching on TV and I’ve read about people who have posted pictures of their poop. Your life is not that interesting. We don’t need to know.

I should probably think of two more to make it a nice round 10, but that’s all I’ve got.