Some Facebook questions

This was asked on the radio this morning and I am posting here rather than Facebook due to space constraints: How soon is too soon to friend someone on Facebook? The radio question asked specifically about friending someone after a first date, but in general, how soon is too soon to search someone and friend them on Facebook? Do you think it’s a little creepy for someone you just met to look you up on Facebook and send a request? Do you feel obligated to say yes?

Another part of the discussion was about work. If someone new starts at your organization do you friend them immediately? Do you feel obligated to say yes if it is someone from work? Do you immediately say no if it someone from work? How about family? Do you feel obligated to say yes to requests from family members, even distant ones? Do you feel differently about requests from high school and/or college friends?

My answer has evolved over time. When I first signed on to Facebook I didn’t decline many friend requests. If I had ever met the person, I would say yes. I didn’t see the harm in it. As I have been on Facebook, this has changed. I don’t say yes to a request from someone I have met, but with whom I have no personal connection. I don’t say yes just because we work together. Actually, these days I am more likely to say no to someone from work unless they are someone with whom I would socialize after work. I generally say yes to family members, even if I barely know them. I will say yes to high school and college people if I can actually remember who they are. I can’t answer the dating question. I think my wife would not approve of me dating.

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4 Comments

  1. That was a lot of questions. I don’t like to look Iike a stalker so I let the people come to me. If I get one from family, I accept, but I have unfriended 2 people and hidden several more. Don’t tell my mom.

    I do the same for work, but sometimes I realize everyone else is friends with someone and I’m not and then I’m all like “dude, what the heck?” I do like to friend my kids’ friends’ parents if I like them so that they will like me back. Is that pathetic?

    And I’m totally telling your wife that you’re dating.

    • I don’t know that I like any of my kid’s friends’ parents enough to care if they like me. The only ones I am friends with on Facebook are ones that I know well through sports or the neighborhood. I’m not sure you answered all of the questions. I will have to give you an incomplete on the assignment.

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